While I have my disagreements with the minds behind it, there’s no denying the lasting entertainment of this piece. Continue reading
It’s a season of transition for many, as students graduate and prepare for the next stage of their lives. My cousin and brother have both graduated from high school. Many high school students will go on to college/university.
But this cultural edifice is not for me.
Be careful how you share this online, so my grandparents don’t see it (!) but in spite of their repeated entreaties, I don’t feel the need for more than my 4.0 Associate of Arts degree. In case some of my reasons resonate with you, I’m sharing them. Continue reading
(This post might be more interesting to the writers among us, but readers and buyers-of-books are also affected by the dynamics of this issue.)
Author’sGuild.org recently posted an article discussing a change in Amazon’s algorithms regarding who gets top billing in what is called the “buy box” of books – apparently the display at the top that lists all available formats and the relative prices. As you might know, a little farther down appear links to other retailers offering “used” or “new” copies of the books.
Currently, Amazon places itself in the prime “buy box” spot, as the first buy-option people see, but according to the article Amazon intends to use metrics to allow third-party retailers the chance to get in that prize spot. (Amazon gets its stock from the publishers, but acts as the distributor itself.)
Author’s Guild (AG) is incensed at the suggested change, but on reading their article I find their arguments less than compelling. Continue reading
I’m facing the imminent collapse of my nation. “Imminent” might mean (hopefully means) fifty or seventy years from now, but the full end of the United States is inevitable. It happened to Rome, to the U.S.S.R., to the Ming dynasty, to Babel…
But I’m not here to talk about cultural suicide or political theory. I’m here to offer a eulogy of sorts to ten things I will miss when civilization as I know it takes a turn for the worst. It’s how I cope, okay? 😛 Continue reading
5 Ways to Fix a Little Brother Who Grew
The brother. At first he was a manageable size – perhaps bread-box sized. Next he started moving around, and was more dog-sized, but that was all right, since you’d grown, too. Eventually, he was allowed out of the high chair, because he was too big for that, but you didn’t need to investigate your options prematurely…
Then. Then you got up one morning and there he was: an enormous creature, towering over you. How? Why? And how was it you weren’t consulted?
- Bricks on his head.
Ideally, this should be done before the growth takes place, but if you are at a stage when slowing him down won’t help, the best you can hope for is that they’ll 1) telescope his spine, or 2) give him a bad stoop, bringing him back to eye-level.
2. Platform shoes.
The poor girl’s solution, and not really feasible if you are a short older brother.
3. Instill in him a proper respect for authority.
Again, this is ideally begun at an earlier stage, but there’s no harm done in attacking the root of the issue. Young men who respect their elders and betters will naturally refrain from dominating the head-space.
4. Only appear next to him in forced perspective.
This might seem like a band-aid solution, but if it protects your pride, that’s a vital organ to protect.
5. LAST RESORT SOLUTION: Bludgeon him into submission and make him crawl on his hands and knees.
This should only be undertaken under the most drastic of circumstances. Tip: if bludgeoning is not an option for moral, physical, or financial reasons, hiding his game controller or unplugging his computer might yield similar results.
(If you succeed in subjugating him, congratulate yourself! You may have lost the height battle, but you’ve gained a minion, and the usefulness of those as cannon fodder and hero-distractions cannot be minimized.)
Her wonderful little brother turns 19 on February 8th. 😊