Dear Diary…a reversal of stereotypes

Been a month since anything really interesting happened. It’s now the 7th of Goodmonth, and we arrived not long ago in the village of Harrington (which, to call it a village is kinda stretching the term. There’s an inn and a big manor house, plus a few scattered cottages).

We approached the inn first, but it’s been a rough month. I think we had maybe three copper pieces between us. If only we hadn’t bought the –

Well, anyway, Ezekiel chatted up the proprietor, but the proprietor couldn’t help us (too pricy and not interested in a labor exchange) and suggested we try up at the manor house. Apparently there’s a cleric of Pholtus the Blinding Light up there.

Ezekiel (naturally) was very excited, and we trotted on up there. The place had definitely seen better days, but didn’t have “that look” if you know what I mean…the look that I should be watching my back for undead.

Mikael told Nori to hang out on the roof so as not to disturb the residents.

The man of the house is named Haraldus, and once Ezekiel explained our situation he was more than happy to exchange some supplies and lodging for some service.

As he explained, he had five acolytes he wanted to take to a chapel of Pholtus the Blinding Light (the “Chapel of Light”), so they could further study the “true faith,” and he wanted some mercenary protection for them on the road. In fact, he offered us fifty gold apiece if we helped him out!

Well, we figured we could handle that, so we agreed, and Haraldus sat us down to enjoy stew with his five acolytes (wearing grey/white cloaks with hoods that hid their faces).

Haraldus gave a long prayer over the food – even longer than Ezekiel might give. When he was finally done, the acolytes threw back their hoods and started eating.

……They were hobgoblins.

Not the stew, I mean. The acolytes.

The four of us kinda looked at each other, then Ezekiel slapped on an exaggerated smile and started eating stew.

Gotta say. It was excellent stew.

At our questions, Haraldus explained that some time ago, he had been captured by the hobgoblins of these acolytes’ tribe – with the whole rest of his party being slaughtered.

(Sounds familiar.)

However, Haraldus insisted on preaching the One True Path to the hobgoblins, and these five were persuaded to leave their barbaric ways and follow the pure Pholtus (of the Blinding Light). The hobgoblins confirmed his story eagerly in between guzzling stew.

My brother Tomlin always said, “If you don’t ask, you won’t know.” (Tomlin was a hopeless nerd, by the way.)

So we asked: “Why would a group of goblins, hobgoblins, and bugbears attack a small village for no reason?”

The acolytes said, “Oh, hobgoblins very mean, very violent. Us hates that way now.”

So…Sorry, Ertulli – goblins are just mean and violent.

Well, the dishes are cleared, and we leave early in the morning (so as not to disturb the villagers). Ezekiel is currently talking to Haraldus about Nori, explaining that she’s really quite nice, actually, just kinda scary when people first see her (especially unexpectedly).

****

Mikael cast Predict Weather this morning (eager to try out his new spells), and said the weather would be “good.”

We introduced the hobgoblins to Nori, and they took her in stride. Duh, they’re hobgoblins. They probably have pet spiders and snakes all the time or something (I have not asked about that yet).

Which is good, because she took down a deer and came trotting into our camp at lunchtime, dragging the partially-munched carcass. Good thing we don’t have a floor for her to mess up.

Made good time, and set up camp in a little wood.

I get to sleep a little before my watch.

****

Nothing is ever simple, is it.

I was on watch when I noticed footsteps surrounding us. While I roused Raven, I realized it sounded like dwarvish feet (they’re small but heavy, and they usually go rattle-clack somehow).

I got Ezekiel and Haraldus up, and while Mikael was calling Nori to stand by, a dwarf came close enough that we could see him and hailed us.

“Who comes?” asked Ezekiel.

“Durglower,” answered the dwarf, which I thought was the name of his tribe – or maybe swearing – but is actually just his name.

Then he (the dwarf) demanded that we hand over the hobgoblins to be executed because their tribe had killed some dwarves.

Haraldus refused, explaining that these hobgoblins were good, now, and had reformed.

Ezekiel also pontificated about how the acolytes were under our protection, and we couldn’t just look the other way on them getting killed.

Well, obviously this made the Dwarf mad.

Ezekiel tore the cover off his shield of Perpetual Light, and the woods lit up with harsh white light and extreme shadows. Then he went for Durglower, and battle was joined.

Haraldus led the hobgoblins in singing “O Blinding Light,” which might have been just as effective a weapon as anything.

The dwarves focused their attacks on the acolytes for the most part, which I think was good for us.

I spotted a dwarf through the trees and started filling him with arrows…but dwarves are unexpectedly tough. I got in four hits, and only then did he start trying to run away.

Meanwhile, Mikael and Nori were somewhere in the dark, trying to bash dwarves. Mikael finally cast Faery Fire, and Nori, of course, knows her business well.

Suddenly, the chief dwarf was yelling, “Fall back!” and the dwarves scattered into the woods.

All except the chief, because Raven charged him, and Ezekiel forced him to surrender.

Haraldus and Mikael went around casting Cure Light Wounds on the acolytes (Haraldus asked “Brother Ezekiel” if he had any healing spells prepared? Yeah, that’ll have to be explained one day…).

One of the acolytes was down, but the others were still singing “O Blinding Light” through their wounds.

Now that’s what I call a radical conversion.

Ezekiel did his pomp-talk to the dwarven chief (Durglower Rockvein), all about how they attacked us in the dead of night without warning, but he didn’t hold ill will against them, and would let them bury their own dead if they wanted.

I counted up three dead dwarves (two of them covered in Nori’s teeth marks, one of them full of stab wounds from Raven), while we’d also lost an acolyte. We dragged the dead out of the woods and lined them up on the edge of the campsite, then Ezekiel and Raven decided to dig a grave then and there (I guess because they were all wound up. I convinced Ezie to leave the rest of the discussion until morning, and the acolytes, Mikael, and I curled up to sleep the rest of the night as much as possible).

****

Morning. Ezekiel announced that he wanted to let Durglower go, but that he was keeping his sword (which incidentally had been glowing last night) as “discouragement” from any further banditry.

Raven and I weren’t sure that was such a good idea, since – as Raven pointed out – it was likely a family heirloom (the kind of thing people are very attached to) and – as I tried to point out – the kind of thing people might commit murder to try to recover (and would bear a grudge for having stolen).

But then I had a flashback to my Ranger Master, talking about the law of the woods. It’s different out here than it might be in a town, and the victorious combatant deserves the spoils.

We were already being pretty generous in not looting the dead dwarves.

And…it was a very impressive looking short sword.

So that’s that. We buried Mook the hobgoblin, Haraldus gave a long and passionate burial service (complete with singing), and we prepared to go after breakfast.

Durglower was not excited to share stew with us, and took off as soon as we let him.

Hope we won’t have trouble there later.

Mikael says the weather prediction is “good.”


This is a continuation of the adventure begun in “How Did It All Start?” To get to know the characters better, click here.

To read where we left off last time, click here.

Subscribe to Kimia Wood’s mailing list for book updates!

5 Love Languages—Translating Our Affection

The “five love languages” is a concept invented by Pastor Gary Chapman (see the official site here), and it theorizes that different people show and experience affection in different ways.

Some feel loved by “Physical Touch.” Others value “Giving Gifts.” “Acts of Service” or “Quality Time” are how some people feel most affirmed or loved, while “Words of Affirmation” complete some people’s world.

Do You Speak My Language?

5 Love Languages—Translating Our Affection — Kimia Wood

Sibling love!

Most of us don’t go around wanting to hurt people, or offend them, or do things that make them uncomfortable.

But what if someone told you how much they admired you and enjoyed being your friend…in Tagalog? Chances are you wouldn’t have any idea what they meant, and wouldn’t be built up by it.

We’re full of friendly feelings, kind thoughts, and compassionate impulses. We want to make everyone around us feel special, and show the love of Jesus.

How can we do it in a way that they understand? Sure, they might know we mean well, and appreciate what we’re doing…but can we do it in a way that speaks to their heart?

Refocusing the questions

I once went through a quiz to discover my love language, and the questions went something like this:

“I feel affirmed when you _[pick one]_.”

“When you _[pick one]_, I really feel loved.”

There’s nothing exactly wrong with this…except my responses would vary depending on who I was thinking about (Mom, Dad, brother, coworker, best friend).

Mom is always doing things for us. So when she buys me a gift, it means that much more – because she went out of her way to do that.

My brother’s big on hugs. When he does the dishes without being asked? That’s huge.

So…I’m not unique in this revelation, but if we really want to identify our own (and others’) “love language,” let’s start with how we prefer to give affection!

Step 1: Subject in a Controlled Environment

Take a look at yourself! You can know yourself better and more easily than you can know anyone else. So…

A coworker is going through a hard time. You:

  • Take a meal to their house.
  • Sit with them at lunch and try to just “be there.”
  • Write them an encouraging note.

It’s your mom’s birthday! You want to show her how much she means! You:

  • Buy her something big and expensive.
  • Go to her house to give her a big hug in person.
  • Call her on the phone (you’ve composed a poem in her honor to read to her).
  • Take her to a movie/concert/dinner/something she enjoys

You want to affirm your best friend. You:

  • Write down all the things you appreciate about them, and give them the note.
  • Mow their lawn, fix their sink, or babysit their kids.
  • Buy them a little something, just because.
  • Ask to spend a day with them, doing whatever they want.

When you want to reach out to someone, what’s your default method?

Obviously, you probably don’t go around hugging strangers (that would be weird)…but do you make sure to kiss your family members before bed every night? Do you like giving high-fives, fist-bumps, and side-hugs? You might be a “Physical Touch” person.

Now that you’ve done this step, you have a better idea what to look for. And we can actually apply this knowledge to translating your care for someone into their language!

Step 2: Observations in the Wild

5 Love Languages—Translating Our Affection — Kimia WoodPick another person. Any person. Coworker, cousin, church sibling, parent, child, neighbor…any person you interact with! We’ll arbitrarily name them “Taylor” for simplicity’s sake.

Now for the hard questions. When Taylor sees a coworker feeling down, he/she:

  • Bakes a cake for them.
  • Slips a note into their locker.
  • Hugs them (not caring that it’s weird!)
  • Sits and listens to them…no matter how long it takes.

Taylor’s grandma isn’t feeling well. He/she:

  • Volunteers to drive Grandma to all the doctor’s visits.
  • Calls Grandma every day, just to check in.
  • Does the laundry and dishes for her.
  • Assembles all the kids to go see Grandma in person.

When Taylor wants to let you know he/she’s happy to see you, he/she:

  • Hugs you.
  • Tells you how important you are in his/her life.
  • Offers to do a chore for you.
  • Asks to go out sometime, to a movie/concert/dinner/shopping/ministry opportunity.
  • Gives you something (even if it’s just the cupcake in his/her hand!).

Starting to make sense? What is Taylor’s default method for telling someone, “You are special” or “I like being your friend”?

With this data, you can move to the next step…

Step 3: Speak Their Language!

I’ve been (re)reading this awesome book about sharing the Good News of Jesus in a way your listeners can understand. It’s not just about avoiding “propitiation” and “double predestination”…it’s about finding the piece of the amazing good news about Jesus that specifically speaks to their hearts, that the Holy Spirit wants to use to bring them to God.

This applies to showing affection, too! God calls us to love our neighbors as we love ourselves. But if your grandma doesn’t adore heavy metal rock as much as you do, that CD you gave her won’t seem loving to her (except that she’s your grandma and knows you mean well).

How can we show love, concern, affection, and self-sacrificial humility to those around us? How can we “speak” in a way that their hearts instinctively understand that we want to build them up?

When my dad gives me a present, I know he loves me…but when he vacuums, or fixes the house, I see him stepping out of his “default” to show how he cares for us!

Now step out there and speak in someone else’s language. Even if they knew you cared before, this might make them say, “Hey…I guess they really mean it!”


5 Love Languages—Translating Our Affection — Kimia WoodKimia Wood is into gifts…so (ahem) check out that Books tab (cough)!

She currently lives somewhere in the American Midwest, bracing for the collapse of society by knitting, baking, writing, hobby-farming, and reading as much Twitter as possible before the web goes dark.

Subscribe to the mailing list for a FREE e-copy of her post-apocalyptic adventure novella Soldier! You’ll also receive periodic updates on her latest reading and writing adventures.

Dear Diary…strangers on the road

Two and a half weeks never went by so quickly. My head feels crammed with new ways to track things in woods, new ways to kill goblins, new ways to move quietly over leaves…

The others have been busy, too, of course. Raven has been at one of the temples in Hochoch, while Mikael disappeared to some secret Druid place in the forest.

Ezekiel is babbling on about some parchment he found in an obscure library that mentioned the “God of gods.” He wants to find out more as soon as he can.

The Richfest in Hochoch was exciting; big towns do it differently than we did in Ertuli. Of course no celebration will be like your memories of how they did it in your childhood…

Tomorrow we start for Hommlet. It’s quite a hike, but hopefully the journey will go smoothly.

****

5th day of Reaping, Waterday

When we stopped for lunch, I noticed some strange tracks on the ground by the road – unlike any creature I’d ever heard about. Not comforting.

Not long afterward, we spotted a boy in a bright red shirt making his way toward us. He seemed to be trying to hide from something, but Mikael hailed him, and then he came up to us.

We exchanged the usual about where we were heading, and Mikael asked if the strange tracks were “his people.”

The boy said yes, and laughed. (He did a lot of laughing.)

Mikael smiled, too, and said they were the Wandering Folk, the Tzigane – and that all Druids have at least heard about them.

The boy wandered over to Raven and tried to swipe one of his daggers…but Raven caught his hand.

That made the boy laugh. (I’m not keen on all this laughing.)

Raven smiled and held one of the daggers out to the boy.

The boy laughed again and took it. “You’re strange Gorgio,” he said.

“Aren’t all Gorgio strange?” I asked.

He laughed (again) and said yes, and then he said that he liked Raven.

Reminds me of a brother of mine…

About that time, a little girl appeared, calling for “Nicolai.” She came up and asked the boy what he was doing.

“I’ve been working, Marta,” he said, tossing the dagger casually.

“If you were working, you wouldn’t be showing me,” she said. And she told him to come along.

He invited us to come with, so we headed off along the road. Mikael (and I) realized Nicolai probably hadn’t seen Nori, so he told her to stay in the trees out of sight. A giant, hairy spider can be a little off-putting at first.

After a ways, we split off from the road – but were still going with the trail of strange markings. (Whatever animal that is, I’m not sure I want to meet it.)

Finally, we reached a clearing with several bright-colored carriages or wagons, several horses, and men and women in clothes of all kinds of colors. (Those tracks aren’t anything like horse-hooves or wagon wheels…)

The boy introduced us as his friends, and introduced us to his uncle (also Nicolai). (The leader is a dark-haired man…doesn’t seem to like us. Not like I blame him, but keep your wits on…)

Uncle Nicolai seems like a decent fellow. He casually told us that the horses would be less nervous if our spider kept her distance…which is much calmer than that inn in Hochoch who told Mikael “no pets.”

The uncle is also a musician, and an impressive one. He asked for our story, so Ezekiel unloaded the whole saga of him (Ezie) getting killed.

As he listened, the minstrel kept thrumming his instrument (a lyre or mandolin, I think) and when it was done he sang the story back to us. So, setting poetry on the fly – that’s pretty impressive!

When he was done, he said he usually got paid for his songs…but it was our story he was singing, so how could we be expected to pay for that?

(Glad he saw it that way, since it’s a long way to Hommlet, and we might need what little cash we have.)

Raven went off to talk to one of the horses (yeah, apparently Monks can do that, now. He’s really excited about it) until the ladies called us all to the campfire for dinner.

These Tzigane people are very friendly. One blond-haired girl even tried to sit up against Ezekiel, but he smiled at her and scooted closer to Raven, so she stayed next to her brother or cousin or something.

A dog came through, and seemed to be having a deep conversation with Raven. Beside me, Mikael was watching them closely. I can see it doesn’t seem fair that a Monk can do something that a Druid can’t.

As we ate our stew, one of the women offered to read Ezekiel’s fortune if he “crossed her palm with silver” – so he gave her a gold piece (which is not silver) and she looked at his palm.

(I would make a lousy salesman. “Can I interest you in this fine leather jacket?” “Sure. Oh, you want me to pay for it? But you’re the one who brought it up!” Better stick with Rangering.)

She told him many things—

  • remember the God of Gods’ rules
  • he’ll go on a long journey, and face a demon (oik!)
  • he’ll face ill health before reaching town (what a surprise!)
  • a rich merchant at the full moon will help him

We sat around the fire all evening, until one by one we dropped off to sleep. I told Mikael I’d take first watch (setting a watch? OF COURSE. Who am I again?). Feels a lot like a party, what with sleeping in the open air and being guests “of honor,” but…well…you never know.

The firelight and the starlight are beautiful, though.

****

I must have dozed off because suddenly the dog was licking my face, and the fire had died down.

I sat up and thanked the dog, who went over to lay down by Raven (I’ll say this for Raven, he makes a splash with whoever he talks to).

About midnight, I woke Mikael up and lay down – and in the morning we were all alive and had all our belongings as far as I know.

The Tzigane started packing up, and Mikael hurried over to talk to the horse (apparently he prayed for Speak to Animals this morning, to show he wasn’t outclassed by the Monk). Raven also went over to the horses and helped with their care – maybe being able to talk to the horses helps you take care of them.

Ezekiel gave a string of pompous, flowery speeches about unexpected friendship and what-not. (Why don’t you just say “we think you’re all crooks, and are unexpectedly pleased to still have the clothes on our backs”? If that’s what you’re really thinking? Ezekiel…)

Little Nicolai gave Raven a hug good-bye, immediately after which Raven told me he’s missing another dagger.

Reminds me of a brother of mine…

Ezekiel gave the chief a gold piece…and after the chief decided to not be offended (I thought it was a toss-up for a moment there) he called for Little Nicolai. The boy appeared, steered by his mother, and they made him give Raven his dagger back.

Well, whatever else, it seems we’ve made a splash. I hope they enjoy talking about these “weird Gorgio” for a while.

(Oh, one of them told me about the tracks. Apparently it’s something they do to the ground so they can find each other in the woods, and recognize their own trails. Clever. I’ll have to remember that trick.)

We were just about to leave when one of the ladies put a “blessing” on us. Ezekiel thanked her (at length – makes me think of a brother of mine) and we parted, finding our way back to the main road.

Looks like a fine day for marching.

****

Not too far down the road, I smelled something familiar. Oh, I’m getting really accustomed (and tired) of that particular scent!

Goblins. Five goblins.

Ezekiel took one down with his mace. Nori sprang into action and bit the neck of another one.

I was excited to try out what Master was just teaching me about Giant-Class Humanoids…and sure enough, my arrows flew true and hit my targets in the vulnerable places, killing them!

It sure feels good to be effective at something for once.

Mikael helped me search their pockets, where we found a decent amount of silver – and a parchment with weird writing on it. The letters seem to swirl and pulse in a way that gives me a headache.

Ezekiel is carrying it for now, since he’s the closest thing to a scholar we have right now.

(I asked Mikael what happened to his Magic Horn of Bubbles. He said, well, there was this guy bothering his sister, so he left it behind to try to make him leave her alone.)

If the rest of the journey is as quiet as this, I will be happy. No injuries so far, no “Ezekiel sitting on a snake” incidents, none of that.

We’ll have excitement enough if we really have to fight a demon.


This is a continuation of the adventure begun in “How Did It All Start?” To get to know the characters better, click here.

To read where we left off last time (the conclusion of the last adventure) click here.

Find the next entry here!

Subscribe to Kimia Wood’s mailing list for book updates!

5 Stages of Singleness

5 Stages of Singleness

5 Stages of Singleness — Kimia Wood — single Christian

Photo by Oliver Roos on Unsplash

So. You’re Christian. You’re single.

There’s ups and downs that go with that territory, and if you’re like me, you might find yourself going through these five “stages” of singleness (probably bouncing between them with the shifts of the wind!):

Denial

Marriage? Bah! Marriage forces you to get along with a radically different person for the rest of your life, mirroring the love of Christ for His church in your self-sacrificial service to one another.

Who needs that work?

This is the mood where you think spouses aren’t all they’re cracked up to be.

Every story on the planet includes a romantic subplot (if it’s not a straight-up romance story), every song on the radio (no matter what station) is talking about pairing up, and every person you know is “involved,” about to be “involved,” or trying to be “involved”…but that doesn’t mean you should take it seriously. Continue reading

Being Not Achieving—What Vacation Taught Me

Being Not Achieving—What Vacation Taught Me — Kimia Wood

Some things you gotta see for yourself…

For the past two weeks, I’ve been on vacation with my family. And I’ve been sick the whole stinkin’ time.

You know how any vacation goes…the expectation, the planning, the packing and list-making… This particular time, we were camping – so the organization of “this goes in my tent”, “this smells like food, so goes in the bear barrel”, “this is only for the car ride” was intensified.

I always over-pack for car rides, vacations, etc. I had my list of everything I could get done (see below) and anticipation was especially high since this is the last extended vacation for our immediate family for the foreseeable future (four adults’ work schedules are hard to coordinate).

But God allowed something else to happen. Namely, a “sinus infection” that is still making my voice softer and weaker than normal! Continue reading

Dear Diary…the journey home

ALERT: May Contain Spoilers for the Adventure: “Against the Cult of the Reptile God”

First thing after breakfast, I accompanied Mikael back to the lower level. We know the water will start to creep in, now that the zombies aren’t running their pump, but it shouldn’t go fast enough to cause us problems.

And he wanted to try befriending that vicious-looking bipedal lizard thing.

So while the others hauled all the treasure up to our cart in the over-world, we made one last trip to the depths… Continue reading

Dear Diary…foes and fortunes Part 2

ALERT: May Contain Spoilers for the Adventure: “Against the Cult of the Reptile God”

We arrived at the VIP quarters without incident, and while I mixed up something to eat from the late guards’ supplies, Mikael cast Detect Magic on the jewelry we’d acquired from the harpy.

He pronounced a gold necklace to be magical, so Ezekiel looked over it. He has done a lot of traveling and studying, after all.

As he looked it over, he started cackling and whooping.

“I think,” he said. “I think this is a ‘Necklace of Adaptation’ – meaning it’ll ‘adapt’ your breathing to any environment: vacuum, gas, water, whatever!”

So we gave it to Lancell to wear, at least for as long as we’re in the dungeon, since he’s our front line heavy hitter. Continue reading

Dear Diary…foes and fortunes Part 1

ALERT: May Contain Spoilers for the Adventure: “Against the Cult of the Reptile God”

Far above where the sun shone, dawn broke. Lancell and Nori the spider were moving again, and seemed none the worse for spending the night paralyzed. Even Ezekiel had color in his face again, so we headed out in our usual battle formation.

Down the hall, about the turn where Ezekiel was attacked before, the lizardmen (trogs) suddenly melted out of the shadows and fell upon us.

We must have startled them as much as they surprised us – that, or they were consumed with hatred to hit us – because two of them cut down their companions in front of them before we could even engage.

Nori pounced and sank her fangs into one of the stinking creatures, while Mikael leaned against the wall of the passage, clearly trying not to hurl.

I launched my arrow while Raven darted forward and did one of his Monk-ish palm-punches, stunning the trog.

The luck didn’t stay on our side, though. Nori was felled to the ground with a stone ax, and I…sort of…grazed Mikael’s arm with an arrow.

Lancell was dropping trogs left and right, while Ezekiel soaked up punishment until he was leveled to the ground.

I tell you it was my bow, but somehow it slipped from my hand and came back to whack me in the eye. My next shot finally flew true, though, and nailed a trog through the throat… The enemy was defeated. Continue reading

Dear Diary…a cakewalk – NOT!

ALERT: May Contain Spoilers for the Adventure: “Against the Cult of the Reptile God”

We left the chunks of ivory with Kelsier for him to get appraised and sold off. He’ll leave our shares with Olwin at the Slumbering Serpent — we wanted to get an early start in the morning.

We also hired a cart with detachable wheels that should make lugging treasure through the swamp easier.

When we reached the swamp I was happy to see the trail seemed less traveled than before. Apparently we’ve cut down on the traffic! Maybe without E.D. goading them on, the trog population will keep to themselves.

****

The 15th day of Wielsan we returned to the dyke that surrounded the dungeon opening. It seemed less oppressive than when we first encountered it, now that we knew a little more what to expect…and now that the Big Bad was dead. Continue reading