My mom taught me much of what I know. Here’s some of her advice and training from over the years:
-If you don’t like what’s for dinner, you’ll still sit quietly and be polite about it.
-If you get there by cheating, it doesn’t count. I’m looking at you, math worksheets…
-Dilution is the solution to pollution.
-Chocolate fixes a whole lot of things.
-How to make tuna salad, chop an apple, tie a bow in shoe-laces, pet animals…
-If he won’t give you a ring, a surname, and legal rights, he ain’t worth it.
-High-risk behaviors cluster. Counting red flags is not the same thing as “stereotyping”.
Now, some things I didn’t learn from Mom (but had to gather from life experience):
-“Cookie” doesn’t mean “saltine cracker”.
-Those colorful machines in stores have candy inside.
-The little cars and fake ponies in the mall move if you put money in them.
-Those shiny, crinkly wrappers have MAGIC inside (I was already two-years-old when I found this out)!
One last thing – did your mom have her “favorite sayings” that she used more than once? Here are some of my mom’s:
“Give me five bites for a five-year-old.”
“Somebody’s not obeying me.”
“You eat a pound of dirt before you die.”
“Just try to go potty for me.”
“You’re too loud – I can’t hear you!”
“Sit and talk to us about pleasant thing you’ve seen and done.”
Mom’s guidance made me who I am! How did your mom guide you?
She currently lives with her family somewhere in the American midwest, bracing for the collapse of society by knitting, baking, writing, and reading as much Twitter as possible before the web goes dark.
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